Seattle, WA // August 2014
|Just a single gal, not a cat lady (yet ;))|
What may or may not be as self-evident is that I'm single by choice. I have forgone opportunities to become "unsingle-ized" for several reasons which shall (for the time) remain unmentioned. I'm happily single, as much as a person could be happily unsingle - that is, having more ups than downs overall.
Being a Christian single by choice is not a topic that gets much coverage on the Internet. I thought I would try a series of posts about it, with the idea of increasing awareness and opening up conversation.
This first one dives into the ever-popular question: can/should you go places on your own? The problem here is not safety (assume a relatively safe environment). The question is, are "date" activities still fun as a singleton? Here I rate three personal experiences, but of course, there are many more - share your own thoughts in the comments!
Bookstore or LibraryWith friends, fam, or date: 5 / 5
OYO: 4 / 5
Though I have not gone on a bookstore date, the Internet tells me such things exist (dear sirs: well done!). My favorite way to visit a bookstore is with my sister, so I rate it a bit higher than going by myself. If you enjoy babbling on about books, it feels more justifiable if you are talking with someone else. I also feel that conversations about books, online or in person, are more edifying than just thinking about them. That said, a bookstore or library is a place you can be single and nobody stares at you for it. (Let's just say that bookish places are awesome all-round.)
With friends, fam, or date: 2 / 5
OYO: 3 / 5
I admit I have a peculiar shopping style. I approach shopping like a mission, rather than a leisure activity. OYO gets the edge here, since you can set the pace and take the time when you need it where you need it, without any real or imagined feelings of peer pressure. On the flip side, nobody else shares any
Restaurant, Coffee ShopWith friends, fam, or date: 5 / 5 and 4 / 5
OYO: 2 / 5 either way
I spent two years going to Starbucks alone, where I read books, wrote poetry, and surfed the internet. It was very Romantic...though better than sitting at campus, it was also incredibly boring. Overall I've found that eating by yourself is best done at home. As for the date vs. friends/fam aspect, I think a meal is a better icebreaker (and date "format") than coffee, while a chat over coffee is better with family or people you have known a long time.
With friends, fam, or date: 3 / 5
OYO: 5 / 5
This is perhaps every single person's biggest dilemma. From much personal experience, I honestly think going to theaters can be better OYO. There is no chance to talk in a movie, and if there were, the theater would be too loud and your neighbors too annoyed. Coming out of a movie, I like to take some time to digest my impressions, so I would not be ready for an illuminating discussion beyond "that was great/amazing/stupid/wow." I'd go so far to say that movies, even if a good experience, tend to decrease conversation afterwards, rather than provoke it, which defeats the intent of spending quality time with people. (Besides, if I can go watch operas and sci-fi by myself, you can, too.)
So there you have it - a limited selection, but some of the highlights. If your experiences coincide or contradict mine, do leave a comment! What are some cool things to do, or places to go, on your own?