?


Stuck in a rut and want to get out.

I always thought it would be nice to have weekends again, and it is, apart from the propensity to measure time by weekends.  Four months I've been at this job, and though I appreciate it even more than at the beginning, it seems to me I've grown lazy outside of work, and I hate that.

Lately I've wanted nothing more than to go to some foresty place and take a nice long walk.  That's really all I want to do.  The last time we went was in September, to a state park, and it was perfect.

(With the unusually warm weather, fall and winter and spring have all kind of blended together.  Probably it looks much the same right now as it did then.)

There's something I need to do, but I haven't yet figured out what it is.

Anyways, for now, I've been reading a bit.  Academia put a barrier (aka real life) between fiction and me, but nevertheless the reading list remains long.  I'm wading tediously through Dante's The Divine Comedy...for some reason thought there were only 12 cantos of "Hell" when there are actually 34.  Longfellow's is a nice translation, though.

It's Lent, and my goals are simple - think carefully, pray sincerely, and live without fear.  (Or, something intuitive along those lines, which can't be described in words.)  Anxiety as a habit is a very hard thing to detach from, and it is possible to catch it like you would a flu, suddenly and unguarded.  Spring makes it even harder for me.  That makes it the most important time to be "facing it, always facing it."